“You just don’t joke about things like rape”.

Not the most inviting title, I know, and I’m preparing myself for the event of people hating me for my opinions on this matter. Although, if I manage to express myself accurately then this shouldn’t be an issue. I will state now, I do not think rape is funny. It’s a serious issue and a brutally horrific crime.

That being said, I do not think it is off limits when it comes to comedy.

I saw, online, a post of a screen shot of a girl who (on facebook) had updated her status with a joke written by Jimmy Carr, “I don’t like to call it rape, I prefer the term...struggle snuggle” – she neglected to say that it was his joke and didn’t even have it in quotes, this bugged me – and anyone who reads this and knows me is probably groaning at the fact that I’m YET AGAIN talking about Jimmy Carr. Anyway, this status was followed by people criticising the girl for making light of rape but also by people proclaiming genuine belief that rape was not a big deal. One girl commented saying how she had been raped and that’s why she didn’t find the joke funny – she was then met with ridicule from the others. Now, this post I’m writing is not about these people but I will just say: they disgust me. Anyone who genuinely believes rape, in itself, is funny needs to be seriously educated and sterilised. These screenshots were commented on with people saying that everyone in the screenshots who finds rape funny is sick. And after a few of those, this comment appeared:

This is when I became part of a minority. The final statement really annoyed me and that’s why it’s the title of this post. I responded to this person, purely regarding that final sentence and nothing else and asked, in more words than this, “why not?”

Comedy serves a purpose, in my opinion, it makes people laugh and releases endorphins BUT it also brings certain topics and ideas into a social situation. Usually when people are discussing serious issues they are presented in the format of a lecture and it is, ironically enough, forced upon people. Comedy, on the other hand, brings these topics up in an informal setting and makes people think about them without actually forcing any opinions on anyone. Most people don’t actually realise that they are thinking about these things – it’s subtle, yet effective.

If you restrict the topics which are allowed to be tackled with comedy then, in my opinion, you increase the stigma attached to it. Saying you can’t make jokes about rape emphasises the idea of “pity the victim”. You are implying that these people are too precious and sensitive to handle these jokes and quite frankly, I think that’s more offensive than any joke made by Jimmy Carr or any similar comedians. Did anyone ever stop to think that fans of this type of comedy may have been raped? Limiting what you are and are not allowed to say about rape also makes it seem like these people are rape victims and nothing else.

Also, saying “no you can’t talk about this” is censorship. Live comedy has no limitations on it which is addressed in another of Carr’s jokes,

“according to Ofcom, the most offensive words on TV are the ‘f-word’ and the ‘c-word”. But I’m live on stage this evening, so I can say what ever the fuck I like. And those cunts can’t do anything about it!”

Now, if you take this freedom away from comedians the gigs will not be as good; their job will not be done properly and attending a comedy gig will seem redundant because it’ll just be a repeat of anything you see on TV. THIS CANNOT HAPPEN! Anyone who hasn’t been to a comedy gig, cannot imagine the benefits of going. The atmosphere is immense and everyone is there to have a good time so there very few fights.

On a more serious note, if you take this free-range away from comedians, you increase the fear of the topic. People who say “no, don’t laugh at that” just reinforce the idea that it’s a big bad thing that should never be spoken about. With more fear associated with things like rape, it becomes taboo. In fear of offending or upsetting people, it will not be spoken about. And it NEEDS TO BE SPOKEN ABOUT. Not speaking about something, doesn’t make it go away. And the idea that people making jokes about rape, makes it acceptable is complete horse shit – there is no other way I can think of to describe it. If you hear a joke about rape and that makes you think it’s an acceptable thing to do, you are, in all seriousness, a complete and utter moron who should not be allowed to have children. You have some serious mental issues to work out. There is NO CHANCE of a joke about rape making rape an acceptable thing to do. The vast majority of people are repulsed by it – and those who aren’t will soon be in jail, because they’re the ones carrying it out.

I’ve had people say to me that rape is a horrible thing and if you make jokes about it then you are accepting it and agreeing that rape is funny. To that I say, one of my favourite jokes is, “a baby can drown in 4 inches of water...but you might as well run a bath”. Does that mean I accept the murder of babies and agree that it is funny? If you answered yes to that question and actually know me then you need to re-examine why you’re in my life and then get out. Of course I don’t think a baby dying is funny – it’s horrific. But that joke is funny.

I’ve had someone say to me, “if you’d been raped, you wouldn’t find it funny. You’d feel like they were making fun of you”. Actually, no, I’d like to think that being raped would not remove the understanding I have of how these jokes work. Things that I’ve been through, things that I am, get joked about by comedians, like Jimmy Carr, A LOT, it doesn’t offend me because I know how the jokes work; I know why they’re funny; I know where the comedy is coming from and I know that I am not being targeted. These two jokes I’m about to type out, do not effect me but they are good examples of the point I’m trying to make.

“A snakebite won’t kill you...unless of course you’re allergic to cider.”

This joke is works on a couple of levels – one of which is surprise. The first half is the feed-line which builds your expectations of the topic of the joke – in this case, makes you think it’s about snakes. The punch-line, on the other hand, defies your expectations, catches you by surprise and therefore makes you laugh.

“If only Africa had more mosquito nets then every year we could save millions of mosquitoes from dying needlessly of AIDS.”

Now, this joke is deemed more offensive and is seen as being about poverty and ridiculing the sick. NO! It’s works in the same way as the previous joke. You expect it to be about saving sick people in an impoverished country but nope, got you again, it’s about something else.

Comedians make jokes about things that happen in the world, as long as they happen there will be jokes. It has also been said to me that people may not be intelligent enough to realise that these jokes are making fun of rapists, not the victims and not rape – in case this needs explained to anyone, how pathetic and weak does “struggle snugglist” sound? You feel stupid just saying it. And how pathetic are rapists? Tah dah! Anyway, if people can’t work out what these jokes are about then that’s their problem. I have no issue explaining jokes to people, if they don’t understand but their lack of understanding is not reason enough to restrict the comedian – he/she has done nothing wrong.

 Another point – and I realise I’ve been going on a while – I have noticed that only certain jokes about rape are complained about. Carr does another joke,

“my girlfriend said to me during sex, ‘did you lock the front door’ ‘yeah there’s no way you’ll escape’”.

This joke doesn’t tend to receive any sounds of disapproval however, it is also about rape.

“I said to my girlfriend, ‘do you want to experiment with a role-play, rape fantasy?’ She said, ‘No!’ I said, ‘that’s the spirit!”

Another roar of laughter, no sound of disapproval. Also a joke about rape. Why are these jokes acceptable but the first one is not? They are all about rape.

Finally, making jokes about rape does not mean you are joking about rape. There is a big difference between the two. And if you don’t like this type of comedy then don’t watch it. Simple as.

If anything in this post has offended you then I hope you aren’t still reading this because no one’s forcing you and you’re just creating your own misery.

Thanks to all who provided their opinions for me to respond to. Open to comments and prepared for disagreements.