Hate Speech and Free Speech. Know the difference.

Browsing through pinknews.co.uk and I came across this story. The Daily Mail being accused of homophobia – SHOCKER! I’m so used to seeing/hearing that, it didn’t even faze me. It wasn’t until I read a bit of the story that I started to get angry. Back story: The LGBT... group Stonewall paid for adverts to go on buses. The adverts had one of their slogans on it, “Some people are gay, get over it!” Now, people were smiling at these adverts and other people were just like “wha...oh, what ever. On with life.” Other people decided that they needed to balance out the discussion with “the other side” and tried to put adverts up which said something like “Post gay and proud. Get over it!” Boris Johnson said no and didn’t allow these adverts to go up, which then caused people to kick up a fuss that it was violating their human right of “free speech”. And THIS is when I started to get angry.

Yes, putting up these adverts is part of their free speech and yes if they went into the centre of town and started proclaiming their post-homosexuality status, they’d be within their rights to do so. It is also, within Mayor Boris Johnson’s right to tell you you’re not allowed to do this.

You can complain it’s not fair and that it’s preferential treatment and how your basic human rights are being ignored whereas other groups are getting their opinions out. But here is why Stonewall can have their adverts. Stonewall’s adverts are showing support and sending out a positive message to LGBT kids everywhere. Whilst the wording may appear to be directed at homophobes, it’s not for homophobes. These adverts are up to show kids that they can be who they are without having to worry about prejudice. Your sexuality or gender identity feels like a big deal to you, before you come out, it’s not until afterwards you realise NO ONE CARES! These adverts are showing kids that people don’t care. They don’t have to hide and they don’t have to be scared. There are kids all over the world, wishing they were dead just because they’re attracted to the same-sex or because their gender and sex don’t match up. These adverts could, theoretically, save someone’s life.

Cut to the opposing adverts claiming that you can stop being gay. That’s a dangerous message.

Firstly: it tells people that being gay is something you should change.

Secondly: it encourages people into a system of mentally damaging and harmful therapy

   which opens them up to ridicule and abuse.

Thirdly: It tells people that being gay is bad and does nothing but perpetuate the idea that    

          you’re different and therefore wrong.

My response to the first point. I’ve written about this before but no harm in saying it again. I’ve received a lot of hassle due to my sexuality – I’ve been verbally, emotionally and physically abused for no reason other than being honest about myself. I was told I deserved the abuse because I “advertised my sexuality” even though I didn’t. I was outed – that’s hardly my fault. It’s had long-term effects on me and I still suffer with it. But you know what, I wouldn’t change it. It’s made me who I am. I’m stronger, smarter and a better judge of people for it. I’m more quick-witted because I’ve had practise at comebacks. I first discovered that I’m funny through this abuse. So no, it’s not something that should change. LGBT... people don’t need to stop being LGBT...other people need to change how they treat LGBT...people.

Second point. “Conversion therapy” is very harmful process that DOESN’T WORK! It doesn’t stop people being gay it just teaches them how to ignore and repress their feelings. And most of the time it doesn’t even do that. The most common result of conversion therapy is them leaving with more problems than they went in with. It’s an abusive, humiliating and emotionally destroying system based upon idiotic ideas.

Third point. If everyone who was different was wrong then we’d have no one. Just because there’s not as many of us as there are heteronormative people – doesn’t mean they’re better. Everyone has their own little quirks and traits which makes them special. Your sexuality/gender identity could lead to you having experiences which highlight various skills and abilities you have, which you may not have known about otherwise. This girl only started talking to me because she thought she was bi and needed someone to talk to and I suppose I was the only approachable lesbian she knew. Cut to now, she is one of my closest friends – I wouldn’t have her if I wasn’t gay, because we’d have no reason to talk. My “gay husband” probably wouldn’t be this close to me if I wasn’t gay and my current girlfriend, we probably wouldn’t even be friends if I was straight. I know that’s a big assumption but if I didn’t have my “gay husband” I wouldn’t be working for his production company, I wouldn’t have started working with a certain gorgeous girl, I wouldn’t have had a reason to talk to her and we wouldn’t have any kind of relationship. I didn’t know I was reasonably good at promotions until I joined this company (I’m not brilliant but I know my way around advertising now). I wouldn’t have a show – that I wrote – being performed next year, because I wouldn’t have had the experiences which inspired it. A lot of bad things happened to me. But that wasn’t because I’m gay. They happened because of the attitudes other people had about me being gay.

So yeah, you can buy your adverts and have them say what ever you want them to – that’s your right as a citizen in a democratic country. But it’s our right to disagree. It’s out right to say no. And it’s Boris Johnson’s right to stand up and not allow your hate speech to influence more, already vulnerable, people. If you’re going to use your right to free speech use it with a rational brain. You might be targeting the weak kid in the playground, but that kid has friends and those friends will do anything they can to protect him.